I seem to have missed a lot. How is everyone doing?

I wanted to write a journal. I wrote and erased about five times when I realized I really don't know what I want to say.

The journal here is an intriguing thing. The station just sent me a notice with a list of upcoming birthdays on it. Apparently it's supposed to be of importance to me. I only recognize one of the names on the list unfortunately. I hope they aren't assuming I'll have anything to do with party plans or the like, I'm very bad at those sorts of things.

I tend to do a lot of thinking. Sometimes it keeps me awake at night, but I'd really rather avoid any sort of chemical sleeping aide. It's... not always bad. This time it was... a mixture of the two. Or maybe it is... I have a hard time differentiating between the two at all sometimes. It is bad because I find myself clumsy, which I have never been. It is good because I don't find myself thinking certain thoughts quite as often. But the why still eludes me, and I don't understand. My own reactions elude me as well.

Several things are perception more than nature. My Id, Ego and Superego are constantly at odds with one another now, there are voices in my head that tell me one thing then another. Self perception, that is one issue. Logic and experience are others. I don't know if it's solid ground I'm standing on, or some sort of strange... malleable quicksand of jell-o. That makes it sound sticky, doesn't it? Maybe I should pick better examples for my metaphors.

( Private )

I've had a lot of time to read, lately. Maybe too much. But the way I look at it, it's the eye of the storm. A shame, the quiet times are nice while they last.
( {Private, hackable if you really care that much} )